The Original Fake Steve Ballmer – Exiled by Blogger!

Conspiracies

SIGN THE PETITION!

Screen Shot 2017-11-01 at 3.47.23 PM

Stop just talking about the “good old days” – Sign the petition and help them to come back!

https://www.change.org/p/microsoft-bring-back-steve-ballmer-as-ceo-of-microsoft?recruiter=818734027&utm_source=share_petition&utm_medium=copylink&utm_campaign=share_petition


“IS AL FRANKEN EVEN HUMAN?”

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It’s an old debate which has once again bubbled to the surface of our culture:

“IS AL FRANKEN EVEN HUMAN?”

In our quest to be generous, inclusive and understanding of the diversities of sentient beings, maybe we have gone too far? Maybe in our zeal to not make others not feel bad, we have allowed ourselves to be duped into accepting things which are counter to our own best interest. I propose ladies and gentlemen that we have made a grave mistake when we have chosen to look away and not seriously look into the question of:

“IS AL FRANKEN EVEN HUMAN?”

Have we devolved so far culturally and intellectually that we cannot recognize what is standing directly before us? Why do we refuse to accept the fact that there is a such thing as monsters? We even elect them to Congress? Are we insane? The first step is to gather our courage and confront the issue head-on by answering the question:

“IS AL FRANKEN EVEN HUMAN?”

 

I think most of you can easily ascertain where I stand on the issue.


SIGN THE PETITION!

Screen Shot 2017-11-01 at 3.47.23 PM

Stop just talking about the “good old days” – Sign the petition and help them to come back!

https://www.change.org/p/microsoft-bring-back-steve-ballmer-as-ceo-of-microsoft?recruiter=818734027&utm_source=share_petition&utm_medium=copylink&utm_campaign=share_petition


BORED! Basketball is Not Enough!

slowday

After seeing this photo of me and my receptionist (Helga the Zunite) in my office at the Clippers Stadium, I realized that I need to get out more.  I actually played carpet-golf for 6 hours that day. I got no emergency calls, no bribe attempts, no kiss-uppers, no begging yes men, no worshippers prostrating themselves before me, no paparazzi outside the window …. even CNN has not told any lies about me this month! In other words, “I am becoming your run-of-the-mill ball-team owning billionaire,” and I HATE IT!

I am in a funk, I’m changing that today!


I am not Evil! – Don’t make me hurt you…

I have been on my “I am not Evil” campaign thing for several months now and it is beginning to take hold!
You see, Google used their slogan, “Don’t be Evil!” for so long that it’s become part of the cultural lexicon. Of course everyone knows that they were talking about Microsoft in general and me in particular. So in order to fight back I occasionally dress up as (or image edit with Paint ’09) a famous villain to demonstrate how ridiculous their contention is, for you see “I am not Evil”.cropped-illuminattiappeal.jpg


SIGN THE PETITION!

Screen Shot 2017-11-01 at 3.47.23 PM

Stop just talking about the “good old days” – Sign the petition and help them to come back!

https://www.change.org/p/microsoft-bring-back-steve-ballmer-as-ceo-of-microsoft?recruiter=818734027&utm_source=share_petition&utm_medium=copylink&utm_campaign=share_petition


Remembering North Korea 11 Years ago

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Jr. has taken over the family business of Running North Korea and he is doing a horrible job! I remember back when Kim Jong Ill ran the place I even went there regularly for conferences and vacation. Yes, vacation in North Korea, think about it:

No congested roadways.

Friendly people who are afraid to death of you.

Security detail following you 24/7 absolutely free.

No pesky internet.

Full nights sleep, the whole country powers down at 7:30 pm.

None of that “deciding things” stress here, they decide everything for you. What a relief.

Brisk, refreshing, exhilarating cold showers (from 6-10 am).

The entire country is on a strict weight watchers plan, not chubbies here.

No messing around trying to figure out the darn tv remote, there is only one channel.

Gilligan’s island reruns from 3-6 everyday.

Elvis impersonators are everywhere. The entire country is dedicated to Elvis.

Back to the good old days of Windows 3.1.

Yes North Korea is a CEO’s dream come true, no complaining workers or whistle-blowers, just contentment and conformity everywhere. “Imagine all the people living for today….”