Why I Gave up Golf

It’s a long story, but I will tell you that my giving up golf had nothing to do with the game itself. I loved the screaming at caddies, throwing putters, cheating on scores, the cool spikey shoes, ….. the game was great and I mastered it. The problem was that when it came to golf I always seemed to attract the wrong kind of partners!

The stories I could tell you about what went on at that course would make a sailor go down on his knees! Let’s just say the very last time I golfed was with Bill and Matt, all they wanted to do was paaaaartay! Whenever I used any golf terminology with them they would laugh so hard. If I said “hole in one,” they’d giggle. If I said “putter” or “ball” or “driver” or “in the ruff” or “bunker” or “doubles” or “links” or “tap” or “spoon, stroke, sweet spot, play through, swing, pinch, club, lay, drop, … ” …. they would turn it into something vulgar.

So I just gave up golf, it reached the point where I couldn’t even look at my “equipment” anymore without blushing, it’s one x-rated filthy sport.